Hello, darling.

So it’s been almost three months since I’ve done anything on Tumblr. Partly because I’m so busy and that so much has been going on in my life that I can’t even find time to scroll through shit. And ALSO because I fell so behind on Tumblr that I just gave up on updating myself… haha.

But yay I’m back! Things have been alright, but stress has been getting the best of me. I try my best to balance it out with good company, particularly my family and my ps’s, but I always find myself being with them because it’s an escape from all the business in my life. School is a struggle. I don’t know how I fucking pulled it off at Lowell High School. Waking up for classes at 7:30 every day? Attending 6-7 classes and never missing one? Shit, this second semester at state has me waking up past noon, attending 2-3 classes a day, and it already irritates me! I give my high school self props…. my college self? Might need to work on it. I know I have to step it up, especially with the end of this school year around the corner. I know I’ll have to make some sacrifices, and that includes continuing to isolate myself from social networks (which I’ve clearly been doing a good job with… 3 months without Tumblr!), and spending more free time doing productive things. I know it’ll all be worth it in the end.

Probably won’t be back again in a while, so this was my brief “appearance.” Goodbye for now loves. Shan’t be long until i return <3

VERY busy though. Between crashing ENG 214 classes and finding the right one, dropping my World Religions class so I could stay in University Chorus, doing homework, and STILL finding time to be with my girls. It’s going to be a lot to manage this semester, but I am fully prepared to take the challenge :) I know all that I’m capable of, and it is SOOO much more than I am being challenged to do.

Totally happy that it’s Friday. I’ve just been so busy, and I haven’t had any REAL time to take a breather. Excited for tonight’s social for VARIOUS REASONS ;), and for a night out with my girls <3

I know I should learn to be more calm because it really is hard to talk to you in a productive way.

But it would be a LOT easier if you didn’t lie to me time and time again. It’s one thing for a friend to lie to my face… But to hear dishonesty from the person you relied on your entire life? The person who nurtured you and took care of you as a child? The person you looked up to as a mother? Yeah, to hear lies from you is just the BIGGEST disappointment.

It would also be a lot easier if you didn’t put me down and call me a failure. Sure, I’m not “Daughter of the Year.” I’m not a perfect student, nor am I the most responsible at times. And I could always point fingers and say, “Well how about you? Are you much of a success story? Didn’t you ever fail?” But I won’t… I won’t bring up your past because you should already know that putting me down won’t make you better or erase your own failures…